It's About To Get Personal: 25 Things You (Wish You) Didn't Know About Steph

As promised, I will kickoff my Getting to Know Steph post series. It will be revealed over the course of a few weeks, but get excited: the future posts will be include a selected picture tour of my life. For those of you who know me, you know this could get pretty dirty.

God help me.

I thought I'd start things off in a basic fashion. Below I've compiled a list of 25 random things about myself. Things I thought some might find interesting. Or disgusting. Or horrifying. Or humorous. Or irrelevant. Or...

Well, I guess we'll see.

So without further adieu, I give you...

25 Things You (Wish You) Didn't Know About Steph

1) My name is Steph.

1) Just kidding. I'm pretty sure most of you know my name is Steph.

1) I have lived in the same town my entire life (minus 1 year at a college 2 hours away, and 1 year in an awesome town 20 minutes away).

2) I love the smell of Home Depot. I don't know why. I just do. When those big automatic doors open, I take a big whiff of lumber/oil/paint/fumes and I fall in love.

3) When I was a child, I was afraid of dogs. Deathly afraid. I have no idea why. Big dogs. Little dogs. Hot dogs. I was so afraid, I refused to go to friend's houses to play if they owned a dog. Even if their mom promised to lock the dog in the basement. This, among many other reasons, hindered my potential childhood popularity with peers (more on this to come later). True Story: For an entire year, I did not set foot in my Nana's house because a dog from her neighborhood often hung around her house. It was big. And I was convinced that it would eat me. Eventually I got it over it. It was good to eventually see Nana again.

4) I have an irrational fear of Stinkbugs. Until a few years ago, these bugs did not exist in the area, nary a few unwelcome visitors from time to time. They are now a plague. And the bane of my existence. And sometimes I have to psych myself up to grab one with a tissue and throw it in the toilet. Don't judge me.

5) Direct Quote from Hubby: "[You] have an impeccable sense of direction, but can't find s*** in [your] own house." It's true. For 3 years, I worked for a county agency that required me to do home visits all over our county. I can get you anywhere you want to go within county borders. But I lose my cell phone and keys at least once a day in the confines of my own home. I'm not even kidding.

6) I can't fart. Outside of a bathroom, that is. Sorry if that is TMI. But it is the truth. I just can't. It's a psychological thing.

7) I am the oldest of 3. I have 2 amazing younger sisters. And I get to boss them around. Whenever I want to. Because I said so.

8) Hubby is 3 years my junior. Yup. I'm a cradle robber. We went to the same high school. When I was a senior, he was a freshman. I barely knew him. But he thought I was cute. Eventually I came around. I love him.

9) I am passionate about the weather. Hubby uses the term "obsessed." I blame it on the fact that my dad used to be an Earth Space science teacher. And since I was (extremely) less athletically inclined than my sisters, my parents encouraged my educational pursuits. Let's face it: I was a geek. I liked science. I had a rocks and minerals collection. I had very few friends. And now, as an adult, I get excited about weather forecasts. What can I say? Maybe I'll become a teacher. Or continue being a geek. We'll see.

10) I was very nonathletic as a child. I had asthma. I think this was a contributing factor. [True story: In fifth grade, when Presidential Fitness Testing was all the rage, I ran the mile in 32 minutes. I'm not sure this is even physically possible. Without going backwards. And using a time machine]. I also was not terribly coordinated. After encouraging educational endeavors, my parents eventually broke down and signed me up for softball. And for 5 years, I played right field. Do you know how many balls get hit to right field? I do. None. This is yet another reason I was less-than-popular with my peers.

11) ONE TIME, in seventh grade, I wet my bed. Once. I promise I was potty trained. This was a freak accident. I was having one of those dreams where you THINK you wake up and walk down to the bathroom to do your business. And, as you are conducting business, you WAKE UP. Only to find that you are in bed, and not the bathroom. And that you are, unfortunately, still conducting business. It was not one of my finer moments.

12) Due to #11, I obsessively go to the bathroom before going to sleep. I think I fear having a repeat performance. But every night, without fail, I will visit the john 2-5 times before being able to (safely) fall asleep. I am proud to say, to date, that we have been accident free for 15 years. And going strong.

13) Despite #10, I hope to run a half-marathon someday. Did I just say that out loud? I eventually got in touch with my athletic side, and presently enjoy exercising. I even jog. It's a lofty goal, but I do hope to reach it someday. I promise to invite you. (And super kudos to my sister, Lissabee, for her plan to participate in a half marathon in March! Go Lissa!)

14) I have an unhealthy relationship with ice cream. I love it. That's all there is to it. My favorite flavor is Breyer's Butter Almond. I also like Bruster's Birthday Cake. And there is nothing like an Oreo Blizzard to make my night. But I digress. Blame my parents for allowing me large heaping bowls of ice cream every night for the first 15 years of my life. Or that I have no self-control. Regardless, every night after dinner, I get that craving for the cold, sweet dessert. And most nights I defeat the craving. And some nights I give in. And some nights I sneak it. And when I get pregnant again, I will up my monthly ice cream intake 10 fold. But until then, I will continue to battle the beast. Let's hope I win.

15) I didn't know how to boil water until seventh grade. Don't judge me.

16) Billy Joel is my all-time favorite musician. He's amazing. And should never stop singing. Or I'll have a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack-ack.

17) I am afraid to drink Organic Milk. This makes me an awful hypocrite. And I promise that the only milk my daughter drinks is organic. But milk skeeves me out sometimes. I've had some bad experiences with milk gone wrong. And not finding out until it was upon my tongue. So forgive me if I am a bit suspect. But, I have found that, with every Whiff Test I've given to Organic Milk, it smells a bit farty. I'm just being honest. Has anyone else experienced this? Should I be concerned?

18) Before I pour a cup of milk, I ALWAYS give it a Whiff Test. As should every milk-consuming human. For heaven's sake.

19) My first car was a grey-blue 1989 Honda Accord. Everything on it was optional. And the first owner did not opt. On anything. But it was my first car, and my baby. Upon receiving it, I promptly named it "Nuanda" and was in love with it until it eventually died 3 years later. And by "died" I mean would continue running after I turned off the ignition. And took the key out. And exited the car. [Bonus points to anyone who can tell me the movie reference for "Nuanda."]

20) If I could live in any other state, I would live in Colorado. There is something in me that feels alive when I go to Colorado. The fresh air. The healthy lifestyles. The mountain views. *Sigh* Anyone want to move there with me?

21) I broke my wrist the summer after Kindergarten. Because I fell off of the monkey bars. Because I lost momentum between two bars. And it was summer. And my hands got sweaty. And I fell to my doom. I was ok though.

22) I was in Marching Band in high school. And I didn't even play an instrument. I was in the colorguard. Yup. I threw the flags. But I will tell you this: we were good. We won awards. And given the chance, we could kick your butt. Does the fact that I was on Homecoming Court redeem my reputation? Let's hope so.

23) I was a Young Life leader for 6 years. Young Life saved my life. You should check it out.

24) I can't handle hearing people eat. Chewing. Chomping. Slurping. It gives me the chills. Like nails on a chalkboard. But the worst, the absolute worst, is gulping. For the love of all things holy, please find a way to consume your beverages without over-extending your throat muscles. The world will be a better place.

25) I read every single Babysitter's Club book ever published. And I am a better person because of it.

There you have it: 25 of the most randomist facts about me. I know. Your life is now enriched because of what you just experienced. You don't have to thank me. I know it in my heart. But, check back in a few days to Get More Personal with Steph. Complete with pictures.

May God be with us.